You'll only need one drink of this to see
Just what they mean when they say, "misery"
You tell me that you want to teeter on the rough side,
Your daily life is awfully dull
Well, you don't have to bungee jump or hang glide,
You don't have to do much at all
Just come on down to Broadway and Bryn Mawr,
There's a little corner store that I know
They'll fix you up and send you out walking,
But it's up to you to find your way home
You tell me that you want an urban experience,
To see how the other half lives
Don't wanna turn your back on the inner city,
To empathize is better than to give
I think I've got the answer that you're seeking,
A way to say goodbye to happy days
The change that's in your pocket now could buy it,
A couple gulps and you'll be on your way
You'll only need one drink of this to see
Just what they mean when they say, "misery"
Like a flat tire when you're out of gas,
It'll leave you in the dumps
Like a torn shirt with no overcoat,
You'll feel like a chump
Like a snakebite with no antidote,
Your hopes will be sunk
But don't be afraid, it's the official drink of your
Local neighborhood drunk
You've never been the type to lose control much,
And everything is pretty much planned
You wonder what it's like to really lose touch,
You've had about as much as you can stand
Don't bother locking up your house behind you,
Don't bother fixing something to eat
Just run up here and buy yourself a tall one,
When you're done just leave your bottles in the street
You'll only need one drink of this to see
Just what they mean when they say, "misery"